


Listen to Your Heart

by Meynara



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Mutual Pining, Pidge Birthday Exchange 2018, Pining Keith (Voltron), Pining Pidge | Katie Holt, Season/Series 04, especially s4e6, just general warnings for season 4 feels honestly, well mostly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-04-18 05:43:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14206356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meynara/pseuds/Meynara
Summary: Faced with the knowledge that he might not see the rest of Team Voltron again for some time, if not ever again, Keith has something to tell Pidge. Only, things don't work out quite the way he hoped OR expected.





	Listen to Your Heart

**Author's Note:**

  * For [foxiea](https://archiveofourown.org/users/foxiea/gifts).



> Written for the Pidge Birthday Exchange
> 
> ....it's still her birthday here for a little over an hour, I swear!

Officially, Keith had already left the team some time ago. Officially, he wasn’t even on the Castleship anymore. It was the middle of the sleep cycle for the Paladins, and (for the most part) they all abided by that one rule of sorts. Even if they weren’t sleeping, they often were doing something quietly on their own. Pidge was often out of her room, so Keith felt safe enough standing outside her door, leaned against the wall in full Marmora garb, quietly thinking to himself. 

He needed to talk to her -- or at least feel as if he had -- before he left again, before his visits to the Castleship would become infrequent, if not nonexistent. When he was attempting to do both duties, he had little time for himself as it was. Now...now that time would be taken up by doing more missions, taking more risks than the other Paladins could imagine.

That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, though. For all that he often appeared to lack strong emotions aside from anger, he _did_ **_feel_ **. In fact, he often felt more than he let on, just letting it stew internally until he got to the point he felt as if he was going to burst.

He couldn’t afford such weakness, not anymore. For that reason, and for his own peace of mind, he’d intended to speak with Pidge before he was gone, only to find everyone presumably asleep.

After another moment of contemplation, he began to speak, his voice low and soft.

“Hey, uh, Pidge, sorry to bother you. If -- well, if, y’know, you’re even awake, which I mean you’re probably not? But...I kinda hope you are. See, I’ve got this feeling inside me, and I know, I know, you’re not a big feelings kind of girl, something we have in common honestly, but I’ve -- I’ve got to at least talk about it, ‘cause Blades? We’re really not supposed to let emotions cloud our judgement. And like, I haven’t, really? Well. Okay, we both know that’s not true, but I’ve been getting better. At least, I think I have been. But I just...my brain keeps coming back to this one point. This one thing I’ve just gotta tell you, while I can, and this might be my last chance.”

He paused, taking in a shaking breath. “We’re at war. I know you know that -- your family is out there, prisoners of that war, but I don’t know if you know just how _bad_ it’s gotten. Being a part of Voltron, there’s some things we just didn’t see that much of, because we’re always fighting the big fights. The good fight. Sticking it to Zarkon, to the Galra who follow him. But there’s so much more going on than any of us could have possibly known. There’s a resistance out there, not just those with the Blade, or those who we’ve talked to, but a bigger, wider rebellion. People who have families of their own, trying to flee, to escape and make lives better for their families and friends and people. I’ve seen those people. I’ve helped those people, listened to them, even listened to some of the other Blades, and so many of them had the same regret. Not all, but enough that I--” Keith had to pause, his fists clenching tightly.

“They regretted not telling the people they loved that they loved them, before they were torn apart. Death, labor camps, forced conscription, there were so many ways people had their lives torn apart. I made my choice, and I’m standing by it, I won’t stop fighting until this war is done, but I just -- before I left, I wanted you to know. I love you, Katie.”

Falling silent, he waited for a beat before pushing himself up and away from the wall, muttering under his breath, not knowing that his words **had** been heard by the Green Paladin in question, who sat on her laptop several decks away, eyes wide and unable to move herself until it was far too late.

Keith was gone.

* * *

That night set the tone for a series of events for one Katie Holt, though she hadn’t known it at the time. Her thoughts would wander back to the words Keith had spoken in odd moments of downtime, causing her to poke at her own feelings like one would a loose tooth, waiting for it to come out.

Had he really meant to confess love for her? Did he really mean it? If he did...Did she care for him in the way he seemed to care for her? The thoughts worried at her mind as she set about taking care of missions for Voltron and her own personal mission to find her family. She never let it distract her when things of importance were going on, never let it distract her from the fight, but it was worrying.

She really, truly and deeply, didn’t know how she felt about him. It wasn’t until after she had reunited with her brother that she finally realized...she had someone she could talk to about these things, someone that wouldn’t look at her strangely or like she’d grown another head.

“Hey, Matt? You know Keith, right?” She tried to keep her tone casual as they sat in the Green Lion’s cockpit, heading back to the Castleship, not wanting to let on just how important this was to her.

“Mm? Yeah, he was a little bit below me and Shiro at the Garrison. What about him? Don’t tell me he’s out here, too.” Matt sounded amused from where he sat behind her, though he **_always_ ** seemed amused by something, so that wasn’t any indication of anything as far as she was concerned.

“Actually, yeah, though he’s probably not at the Castleship right now. He’s another Paladin of Voltron, though he doesn’t exactly have a Lion at the moment. He was Red, then Black while Shiro was missing again, then he just...sorta left with the Blade of Marmora. It’s a long story. Oh, also, he’s half-Galra.” Much as she often did, she did her best to give as full, but concise a story as she could.

“No way? We really knew an alien before we even left Earth? Sweet. Anyway, yeah, I knew him, not as well as Shiro but, I knew him. Why?”

“Well...he’s never been the type of guy to say things he doesn’t mean, right? Like, I don’t think he would, especially not when it comes to like, important things, but I just -- I needed an outside source to verify my own personal data.”

Behind her, Matt stilled, watching her carefully. “No, he’s never been the kind of guy to say that. If he says something, he means it, whether he means it later or not, he really meant it when he said it. Why? What did he tell you, Katie?”

“I should’ve known you’d pick up on that,” Pidge sighed, leaning back. “He...didn’t exactly tell me? Like, he did but...he thought I wouldn’t hear him I guess. I’m sure he wanted to tell me but it was after lights out and people don’t know I keep a camera and microphone set up outside my room to see what goes on there. So I was just...working on something and got the blip that someone was just standing there and he was talking and I just-- Matt, what am I supposed to **_do_ ** about love? He loves _me_.”

Of all the things Pidge could have said, that was the last thing Matt had expected. His eyes widened before he stood, moving to stand beside her seat, placing a hand on her shoulder. “There’s nothing you can do about it, Pidge,” he gripped her shoulder a bit tighter, letting out a breath. “What he feels...affects him, and him alone. If you have feelings for him, though...you might want to tell him at some point soon. Much as I wish otherwise, we **are** in the middle of war. If you don’t, then well...there’s nothing else you _can_ do, especially if he didn’t know you could actually hear him. Just...whatever you do, do what feels right, okay? Listen to your heart. And _no matter what_ , I’m **here** for you.”

Pidge looked up, eyes watering before nodding. “Right, okay, thanks, Matt. Oh, hey, look, there’s the Castleship, we’re almost there.” If he noticed that she was just trying to make a distraction, he didn’t say a thing. Instead, he just smiled and nodded, moving to take a seat as she went to bring them in -- no ship, castle, or combination of the two in sight.

* * *

The more she thought about it, the less certain she was of anything regarding her own feelings and Keith. He wasn’t there on the Castleship, just as she’d figured he wouldn’t be, but despite the time passing, he never seemed to appear like she halfway expected he might.

That, in and of itself should have told her something, but she ignored it because it wasn’t **proof** . Not enough for _her_ , at least.

Instead she continued on as she had been -- doubling down on her attempts to find her father now that she’d found Matt, keeping tabs **_on_ ** Matt so as not to lose him again, and generally doing what needed to be done for the good of the growing Voltron Coalition.

(Just as long as she never, **_NEVER_ ** , had to do the Voltron Show again, please for the love of all that is good in the Universe, never again.)

The preparations were made to go to Naxela, and Pidge stood by, listening to Allura’s broadcast, knowing that so many others were listening as well.

**_Keith_ ** was listening.

_“Far in the future, when they speak of this day, they will speak of our sacrifice ...but they will also remember **this** as the day that freedom began to overtake tyranny. You all have your missions. You know what to do. Good luck. We’ll see you on the other side.”_ Allura’s voice was firm, strong, just as they needed from a leader, from the voice of the Coalition, but that last sentence hit Pidge in just the wrong way.

**Would** they all make it to the other side? She had to hope, to think that this was true...even as her heart clenched, telling her it was entirely possible that they wouldn’t.

That she wouldn’t. That Keith…

No, she couldn’t stop to think about that. Now wasn’t the time. Now wasn’t the time for longing and regret and being some stupid heroine in a stupid romance book, now was time to be angry, to go kick ass and chew bubble gum.

And Pidge was fresh out of bubble gum.

* * *

Naxela was a bomb, a bomb big enough to take out several solar systems, and all that existed within them. Nothing had terrified Pidge quite so much as that thought, knowing so, so many people would be gone, herself included, if they didn’t stop it.

Of course, having done the training she had in the Garrison, and somewhat carrying on in manning communications systems since, she had been keeping an ear out on the communications between Voltron, the Castleship, and Keith and the rebels, in case something came up that would be useful knowledge.

“We’ll never penetrate those shields!” Matt’s voice, normally calm and goofy, was full of fear, almost shrill, causing her heart to pound heavier in her chest. They were going after the fleet that had held Zarkon’s witch, that had caused the situation with Naxela, and his fear was contagious.

She was so caught up in what she heard that she almost missed Keith’s reply. “Maybe not with our _weapons_.” If there had been any doubt before, any at all, of where her heart lay, those five words confirmed it.

She was in love with Keith Fucking Kogane, and they were going to die in the next two minutes.

**_And she couldn’t even tell him._ **

They were out of options, there was nothing more they could do, and Pidge found herself doing something she hadn’t done in years. She began to pray, for herself, for her team, her family.

For Keith.

For the future of the universe, that their battle hadn’t been in vain, that Zarkon would get what he had coming, and that there would be peace in the future, even if it wasn’t for them.

By the time she had done so, quietly, to herself within her lion, she realized she heard voices speaking once more.

They weren’t dead….! They were alive, they all made it, every last one of them!

Even--

_“It wasn’t me, Shiro. It was Lotor.”_

**_Keith!_ **

Pidge quickly blinked the moisture in her eyes away. They had made it, the battle was well and truly won.

There was another battle looming on the horizon, now, and damned if Pidge was going to lose that one as well.

* * *

“Keith!”

Tired, hurt, and filthy, Keith really wanted little more than to fall into bed, or a shower, but the voice he heard calling for him was one of those few things. Turning only confirmed that yes, Pidge was running and waving to him, calling his name.

“Pidge! Hey, uh, what’s -- what’s up?” He tried not to sound too awkward, his face warming slightly, recalling the last time he had attempted to speak with her. Attempted being the main word, given he’d only talked to her door. Surely if she had heard him that night, she would have gotten in contact sooner...right?

Pidge didn’t speak, running until she had gotten right up to him, leaning over and panting lightly. “Keith! I’m so, _so_ glad you made it out alright, I need to talk to you.”

“I, uh, okay, sure, can we maybe sit or someth--” His words were cut off by hands clenching at the fabric that made up his hood, pulling him down as Pidge lifted her head, pressing her lips against his suddenly.

Eyes widening, he was frozen for a long moment before wrapping his arms gently around her, pulling her close as they kissed, everything seeming to fall away for a long moment before she pulled her head back, smiling up at him.

“I love you, too, Keith. Next time, tell me to my _face_ and **_not_ ** my door?”


End file.
